Dusk on Rio Solimoes

A 47-pound Tampaci, Manaus Fish Market

The Long Face

Recently, the Long Shot went up the Amazon River. While he doesn't speak Portuguese, he knows the names of the obscure insects, menacing reptiles, mythical fish, wild cats, and monkeys. He has also become familiar - in a strictly reportorial sense - with an array of young women in miniskirts and "Rockstar" tees. He also had, briefly, an amoeba living in his intestines. Here is the photographic evidence, including shots of his subject, Martin Strel, a crusty, portly 52-year-old Slovenian who is swimming the entire 3,375-mile river, from Atalaya to Belém.

A True Story About A Lyre

There was once a wounded harbor seal named Hoover who was rescued by a crusty old lobsterman somewhere on the Maine coast. The lobsterman nursed Hoover back to health, and the two became very close. So close, in fact, that Hoover learned to say his own name, "Hoover," and he did so with a thick Maine accent, which he got from his rescuers.

This ain't no Hoover. It's even better. This clip form the David Attenborough archives captures the mind-blowing Lyre bird as it demonstrates its ability to imitate any sound on the planet with perfect fidelity. Including: Camera shutter, motorize camera shutter, car alarm, chainsaw, falling trees.

Sit back and get trippy.