2:35 a.m.: Moments ago, I was awoken by the desperate squeaking of a mouse caught in a glue trap under my fridge. I shuddered in bed for a while listening to it. Then I put on my hiking boots and rubber dish gloves, donned noice-cancelling ear phones, and selected the Band's "Tears of Rage" on the guyPod. I went to the utensil drawer and grabbed some salad tongs. I took a deep breath, leaned down and tonged the glued-up mouse, carried him briskly to the shitter and tossed him in. Wretched fucking fate, mouse.

Tears of rage
Tears of grief
Why must i always be the thief?
Come to me now
You know we're so alone
and life is brief."

Especially for mice. Once again: R.I.P. Kimchee, for all the vermin you presumably ate or chased off while I was sleeping.